The crust of creation [ Posted on November 08, 2009 @ 10:49 pm ] chaimustang [ mood | sick ] [ music | I Don't Wanna Be - Gavin DeGraw ] I have been horribly, miserably sick for almost a week now. It is such inconvenient timing for this to be happening. I spent Friday night playing tennis, cooking dinner for friends, and then all night hanging out and playing games. On Saturday I went and hit golf balls, and I spent the rest of the night upstairs with the guys, sniffling and coughing and dying but still welcome. I had dinner and dessert and played video games and watched movies and bad anime. And I curled up on the sofa, a miserable, horrible mess, being told not to die. I hate being sick, I hate showing this weaker side of me, I hate not being fully capable. But I don't mind so much being taken care of, of being low and still having people to hang out with until the wee hours of the morning. These are good people, I wish we didn't have to be so mean to each other. Comment

Oh baby, you're a classic [ Posted on November 05, 2009 @ 9:48 pm ] chaimustang [ music | Tiffany Blews - Fall Out Boy ] I had a very nice time. I held his hand. He bought me dinner. It was exactly what should have happened. I'll probably do it again. He says he's a good judge of character, but he doesn't believe me when I tell him I'm a horrible, mean person. It's hard to care about anything when you're convinced none of it matters, anyway. Comment

Blind [ Posted on November 03, 2009 @ 2:28 am ] oktobergoud (there was a trailer with english subtitles but they did really weird things with the sound.. they sort of 'blopped' the talking out and it was really ugly and ugh :() Aaah I just saw this movie, which was on my list for a long time, and I absolutely loved it. I normally really don't like Dutch movies, because they're most of the time so banal and vulgair, or just really boring, or whatever. I just don't like them! But I remember a few years ago I saw this trailer in the cinema and I was so intrigued with her white hair, haha. Somehow the title was always in my mind, it certainly made an impression on me. So I downloaded and I must say that this is now my favourite Dutch/Belgium movie! Heck, it might even be one of my favourite movies! The story, the actors, the cinematography, the music were all so perfect! The story is about a young, blind man (or maybe even a boy?) who finds a new soulmate in a albino woman. She is hired by his mother to read him stories. She doesn't like to be seen by people, because she's always told how ugly she is, but with him it doesn't matter, because he's blind... he won't see her. Eventually they fall in love, to him, she's the most beautiful person on the planet. Her scars are like snowflakes to him, to him she looks like the icequeen in the story she reads him all the time. But then a miracle happens: there is this new operation so he can see again. Afraid of what he might think of her when he really sees her, she fleds.. The story is a bit of a fairytale itself, really! And so is the cinematography, gosh, it's snowing almost all the time, the scenery is so pretty.. and so are the images. I love it when he's in his own imaginary world and everything is more bright and pretty <3 Aaah can't stop talking :D Anyway, I know most of you won't see this movie because it's Dutch and that's annoying and stuff... but if you ever want to see a Dutch movie, please please go see this one! And here are some screencaps under the cut! I might post this on my blog as well so don't look weird if you have a 'double' post on your friendslist @_@ ( & ) Read (12) Comment

[ Posted on November 02, 2009 @ 12:23 pm ] oktobergoud Ugh, I feel like shit, just like yesterday. I think I'm getting ill or whatever: my throat hurts/is swollen, my muscles aches (specially my neck and upperback, ugh), I have constant headaches, I'm HOT the whole time, sweating my ass off and I feel like I have to puke the whole time, but that's just because my throat feels so weird. It's nothing major though, I mean, like I said, I think I'm GETTING ill... but I still feel shitty :( And I now I still have 2 days off and I have 2 days (okay 3 days or whatever) left to travel for free with my student travel cardddd, but I feel too shitty today I think to actually leave the house :') Wanted to go to the beach, might do that tomorrow, it's too late now I think (I need to travel longggg). I don't even know why I want to go to the beach.. yeah to take some pictures maybe.. but of what... water? Lol idk.. SIGH. There are lots of places I've could have gone to... oh well. Now I'm going to work on my grandparents photo album (ugh do not want!) and go to school to upload it (they don't have software for mac @_@) and maybe that I'll just jump in a train after that.. WE'LL SEE. God I don't even want to eat D: That basically just means I'm very, very sick hahahaha. Oh and I saw Brideshead Revisited last night and idk, it was okay, I guess. It was so tragic though, ugh. AND MATTHEW GOODE, HOLY SHIT, IN MY PANTS PLZ. Haaaa I didn't care too much for Ben Wishaw this time although I love him, he was just too... gay :P I liked his teddybear though.. But ehm yeah idk, I'm intrigued by the story so I might read the book but the movie it self was a bit.. slow? I didn't even know what the meaning of the film itself was.. All I could thing was "where is this going to?? I mean seriously what's this movie going to be about mmm?"... and then it's about a sort of tragic lovestory and whatever but.. just nothing more... I just felt like I missed the essence of the story @_@ It was all sad though :( meh.. Read (11) Comment

I hope you know, this has nothing to do with you [ Posted on November 01, 2009 @ 10:02 pm ] chaimustang [ music | Big Girls Don't Cry - Fergie ] I met a boy. I have already started to ruin it. Because I am SCARED SHITLESS. Comment

http://www.fromthebasement.tv [ Posted on November 01, 2009 @ 5:58 pm ] oktobergoud <3 <3 <3 (I think I'm getting a cold/ill... my throat and head hurts and I feel so shitty and tired, ugh. Might be the reason why I feel so shitty the last few days. It's been raining the whole day, this song sets the mood perfectly ;) be sure to check that website out: http://www.fromthebasement.tv ! they have lots more awesome artists on video!) Read (1) Comment

Hairspiration [ Posted on October 31, 2009 @ 11:51 pm ] oktobergoud Well, it's kinda obvious that it's weekend since I'm posting like crazy today! This is going to be the last post today ;) It will mostly contain pictures, haha, so it's an easy one! Anyway, I'm desperate to grow my hair out, because now I'm really sure I want to go back to longer hair again (think a bobline, not really really long, I'll never be able to grow it out THAT LONG! :P). I mean, I've had all kinds of crazy haircuts and lots of colours and now I'm sick of it and want something nice and long <3 Anyway, last year I wanted to grow it out too (I did grow it out, btw! It got as long as a bob, I could even wear a little ponytail! Then I decided it was too boring and cut it into an asymetrical haircut.. again -_-' I don't like those that much anymore haha, ugh, so sick of them!) so I saved a lot of pictures with pretty, long hair, mostly red! And a lot of braids! Because I love love love LOVE braids! They're the most fantastic thing about long hair, I would wear a Heidi braid aaaaaall day if I had long hair! ( zeh pictures, image heavy! ) Read (35) Comment

[ Posted on October 31, 2009 @ 1:14 pm ] oktobergoud Mm I haven't posted in 'ages', well, comparing to how much I usually post ;) Anyway, nothing interesting's going on. I hate how lazy I've got now I don't go to school anymore, on the other hand I loved it.... just wake up at like 12, lay in bed with your laptop till 1.30 or so, watching Gossip Girl or just hanging around on the internet... but it gets boring after a week or so! I do like the thought that I have nothing important to do, but then there's this pressure that I really need to take some actions towards a career or whatever! I really don't like that :( On the other hand, there are tons of other classmates who graduated in July and still aren't doing anything for a career, just working at a random store, like me! A friend even got hired at Subway, so, yay! :D So I need to get this constant feeling of pressure of my shoulders and just totally relax! I have 4 days off again so I'm going to enjoy that. I'm glad I still have the 365 days project going on because that one forces me to be creative and not becoming TOO lazy. Like I have a goal every day to accomplish, and we all know how I am: I am NOT satisfied with your typical myspace selfportraits, oh no! I have the most amazing pictures in my head for when it's snowing.. but I don't even know if it's going to snow this winter... AT ALL. Sometimes I hate the Netherlands ;) But anyway, I'm still doing that project, yes. I'm not sure how long I will do it, haha, because somedays you really don't want to take a picture! Like yesterday, I was so, so, so tired but I still took the picture above, which I actually really like! :) I like how my face isn't sharp.. makes it more soft? Can NOT wait till my hair's that long, btw! I'm so sick of my short hair, ugh, but it will take ages before it's a bit longer again. It does grow fast, but.. I want a bobline or whatever so bad :( And my hair's also still dead (well, the ends are!) and I can't find a good shampoo! And I really don't want to cut the ends off because then I have to start all over AGAIN. Sigh :( I mean, I know you can't fix dead hair but it's just very dry! I hate that :( So, that's the goal of today: finding a GOOD (probably professional) shampoo & taking today's picture! I'm already at 60/365! :) The weather's beautiful outside so I could take a picture outside... but not sure yet :P Might be too lazy to do that haha. I'm still in bed and it's already 1.30 (PM)! Uhmmm need to get out! Well this was a long boring rant! But eh yeah.. mm... might going to update more on my blog soon! Oh shit I also need to work on that photo album for my grandparents D: woops! Might do that monday at school, I hate how most of those photobooksites don't have software for Macs -_-' Read (1) Comment

Red light special at the mausoleum [ Posted on October 30, 2009 @ 12:43 am ] chaimustang [ music | Macy's Day Parade - Green Day ] It is in the faint scar at the corner of my right eye. It is in the wisps and curls of fine hair forming a messy, uncontrollable halo around my head. It is in the smiley-face pattern and the big dipper hidden in a Where's Waldo of birthmarks and scars. It is in the slight yet noticeable quiver in my lips with every word. It is in the purple-pink stretch marks along my legs. It is only in the imperfections that I find any beauty in myself, and now that I accept that, I couldn't be happier. Comment

[ Posted on October 28, 2009 @ 12:15 am ] chaimustang I hate dreams. They're just images if what your life could be, all the good, all the things you wish you had. They're just reminders of what can never be. I don't want to fall asleep anymore. Read (1) Comment

navigation [ viewing | most recent entries ]